Sue's story
I’ve had the privilege of being a part of Sue’s journey since July 2018. Watching her flourish, grow and start living a life that meets her values has brought much joy to my heart. I’ll confess that reading this testimonial did bring a tear to my eye, a tear of happiness for her. She is a wonderful person with a huge heart that deserves all the happiness that following her own path will bring her and her family.
When I first met Sue, she asked me how to take away the fear of being involved in a fatal accident when travelling. I advised her to think of a different ending, one where arriving at the destination brought excitement and pleasure. Following this meeting, Sue came to see me for help with irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), which she had been advised was related to stress within a difficult and unequal relationship.
We worked together on giving her the tools to set clear boundaries and I also spent time showing her what her strengths were and how they had become overly compensating in the marriage to keep the peace. Together we identified her husband’s strengths and weaknesses so that she could set boundaries from a place of understanding rather than fear.
For a while, things settled but the unequal relationship never truly changed. After a brief respite and experiencing happiness at that moment, she realised ‘what I was missing, and wanted to live a life feeling that happiness, and free from fear.’ Sue could now see that there was much more to life than being a compliant and dutiful wife.
Once she had made that decision, we worked together with as much support as she needed from me, to enable her to have the strength and courage to move on with her life.
During this time, I also enabled Sue to come to terms with her mother’s death some years before. “I now feel comfort and peace when I think of mum, rather than loss and grief. You also helped me when my lovely friend, Roy, died in 2017, and then my dad, in 2019, giving me coping mechanisms which I use whenever I think of them now, and I smile instead of cry”
Sue has moved on from the place she once was and has been able to live her life according to what is important to her, the wonderful relationship she has with her children and to enjoy the happiness that they, as a group of three, experience every day. She is now on her new, chosen path of training to become a counsellor as well as having studied in the past year with The Open University, gaining independence and increasing her self-esteem and self-confidence.
“Over the past three years, Nikki has, with energy, enthusiasm, and selflessness, helped me cope with and manage exceptionally difficult issues, including IBS, grief, and abuse. Thanks to her I, and my children, are now on an exciting and positive path leading us to the life we all deserve to enjoy”
“Nikki began by helping me with fear of travelling, by showing me how to see a positive and happy outcome, I am now living that positive and happy outcome, every day”